Rednecks, Hockey and Snow

Rednecks, here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Canucks

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you may live in Canada.

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Canada.

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Canada

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Canada

If "Vacation" means going anywhere south of Muncie for the weekend, you may live in Canada.

If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Canada

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Canada

If you have switched from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again, you may live in Canada

If you can drive 90 kms/hr through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you may live in Canada

If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Canada

If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Canada

If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you may live in Canada

If the speed limit on the highway is 80km -- you're going 90 and everybody is passing you, you may live in Canada

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you may live in Canada

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you may live in Canada

If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you may live in Canada.

If you find 2 degrees "a little chilly", you may live in Canada

If you actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all your Canadian friends & others, you definitely live in Canada